Do It Afraid…
On March 11, 2022, I walked into the surgery center, with a brave face while I was shivering on the inside. Every thought was a prayer, ”Do it afraid.” Even in my fear, I was able to see little glimpses of God with each step of the process:
The name of the receptionist. The quote on the wall. The name of the nurse. Doctors showing up as favors to my friend. God was there. Every step of the way.
Even still, I was afraid. I wasn’t sure how my people would respond if I broke down and I didn’t want to find out. Yes, I was more concerned about them than me. I needed them to know I was ok even though I wasn’t too sure I was…
A sweet reminder of God’s faithfulness.
When I finally got to the operating room, I asked everybody to stop so I could pray. I prayed for the names I could read on the name tags and those I couldn’t. I prayed over their hands and their wisdom. I prayed away my fear and I immediately got rest. Rest in my Daddy God. I was ready.
It was the first time I admitted I was scared. But I didn’t admit it to people. I admitted it to the One who tells me time and time again not to be afraid. The One who promises to always be with me. Who knew I was afraid and went before me to prepare the way.
It was no coincidence that I saw glimpses of Him from the time I walked in. He was letting me know it was okay and I would be okay. I was safe. He was reminding me that He had been with me the entire time. He covered and protected me because I am His. His daughter. His love. His joy.
So today, I remember the journey. I remember the fear. And I thank Him for the process. For the healing and for trusting me with such an experience. And today, I tell you, Do it Afraid. God will meet you there. He will give you peace, comfort, joy and an overwhelming sense of love. He loves you.
Edited: I wrote this post from a very different place in life. I was still growing and learning God. Today, I know fear is not of God so I no longer co-sign the phrase “do it afraid.” There will be a post explaining more in the near future. Stay tuned…
